More than ever, it is time to hold the vision of co-creating the world we want to experience. The world today is not as it was…
And I’m not talking about the virus and lockdown. For sure everything has changed due to the ‘deadly’ virus but once you look behind the curtain, you discover so much more you hadn’t known that the whole world changes shape.
More and more people are beginning to ask questions about the virus and lockdown. One of my chief values is independent thought. I hope you'll join me in exploring some of the issues we are facing today...
More people, even in mainstream, are wondering why there are such severe travel restrictions given what is now emerging about the virus:
- that it’s not nearly as dangerous as we were initially told
- that the rate of death is on par with any year’s influenza statistics. (Details on this point below.)
- that it is pneumonia in the wake of the virus that kills, not the virus itself. (See video link with epidemiologist below)
- that the calls for a vaccine are suspicious since a patent for the virus was applied for in 2006 (US2006257852), and a patent for the vaccine was applied for in 2014 and granted in November 2019 (EP3172319B1)…
And then there are questions about the lockdown and enforced separations:
Did you know that Isaac Newton wrote his great work, Principia, during the Black Plague, when the university where he worked was closed for nearly two years from 1665 to late 1666?
During his ‘lockdown’ at home, Newton researched mathematics, physics and optics, and laid out the three laws of motion.
What are YOU doing with your time?
So far three new people have contacted me seeking book coaching or writing classes in order to take advantage of this period to work on their own projects. I’d love to support you too – and your kids!
Here are some options that might suit:
We are living in extraordinary times. This is a unique world experience that we are having right now, and truly the biggest virus is probably fear. So here are some thoughts that I hope will serve you in combating anxiety and finding the upside of the coronavirus health issue and lockdown.
I call my e-newsletter/blog ‘The Whole News’ because I want to train myself to look at an issue completely; I want to be able to see both the benefits and the drawbacks, since every issue in life is two-sided. There are benefits for us personally and nationally and internationally. Here are some of my thoughts – please share your ideas in the comments area below.
BENEFITS OF CORONAVIRUS LOCKDOWN
I’ve just finished reading a book called Imperfect – How Our Bodies Shape The People We Become by Lee Kofman.
Lee was scarred as a result of several major operations when she was a child from injuries sustained in a bus accident and from a defective heart. To begin with, she saw her scars as ‘badges of honour’ but as a young woman in Israel,
Okay, at one level that’s a weird question because obviously anyone can set goals, and certainly anyone who needs to achieve a big task is wise to break it down into achievable goals. But I thought I’d share a few related ideas about feminine energy and the goal-setting process...
For example, have you heard of Claire Zammit and her organisation Feminine Power / Evolving Wisdom? She offers some wonderful courses (that I intend to do some time soon!) in which she explains her perspective that men and women should go about their goals in quite different ways
Last Saturday my two sisters and I shared stories about our childhood and the many books we read and how our mother's childhood trauma affected our lives as part of a presentation at Mentone Public Library. We were all very big readers and my younger sister Anita remembers us sitting around the kitchen table engrossed in our library books while eating fresh peas out of the pod. Occasionally she would discover a worm, and then feel sick at the thought that she might have already eaten one…
My older sister Yvette remembers us reading as we walked to and from our primary school.
Last blog I mentioned that I have a new Mastery Club Facilitator on board. Nicky Manning first contacted me five years ago expressing interest in training as a facilitator – but life had other ideas! (No straight lines…)
When her family decided to start home educating in 2019, she contacted me with plans to begin the school week with a Mastery Club session. The group would include her 12-year-old daughter, her daughter’s friend (also home-schooling), and her 24-year-old daughter-in-law, and we’d meet via Skype due to the distances.
We scheduled our sessions for 9 a.m. Mondays and, aside from the odd technical issue, soon I was visiting their lounge room via Skype and leading them through the 10-week course.
The beauty of this program is that it combines powerful information about the mind and universal laws (via video clips, stories and activities) with a goal-setting support group. Each person chose a goal to achieve by the 10th session.
I’m delighted to announce a new Mastery Club Facilitator – more about her and her first course next blog! Meanwhile, here’s a snippet:
Nicky Manning completed The Mastery Club 10-week program with a small group of daughters + friend earlier this year via Skype. She loved it and signed up to facilitate her own programs – and is beginning her first 10-week program tonight in Mt Evelyn with nine women. This lady is a mover and shaker! The plan is for those women to learn some skills and then empower their children. Such a great approach, since we know that family culture is a critical factor in our success and wellbeing.
Have you followed the news story about Canadian PM Justin Trudeau’s apology for blackening his face as part of an Arabian Nights costume some years ago?
He’s been criticised for invoking racist and offensive stereotypes that signal to people of colour that they are second-class citizens.
I have never understood the need for racial slurs. To my mind all people are worthy simply because they are human – and that applies to all life forms: I’d like to see all humans, animals and the Earth itself treated with respect. But something that troubles me about Trudeau’s apology is the increasing weight of political correctness.
This statement was made recently by a passionate speaker during a current affairs interview. It doesn’t matter who she is – she gave voice to a popular point of view. But I disagree.
I think the reason that statement is made is because it seems to justify bullying and people hate that idea, understandably. We don’t want to align ourselves with those who deliberately set out to hurt others.
But there’s a word missing in the above statement, and that word makes all the difference. The missing word is ‘always’: ‘Bullying is not always character-building.’
In other words, our response to the event determines if it will be character-building or not. If we choose to be defeated by the event, our character will not grow; if we choose to deal with it in a more useful manner, our character will grow. It’s as simple as that. Nothing is either good or bad; it’s our response that defines it. Every event is neutral until we place a meaning on it.
Some people will object. They’ll say that cruelty and aggression and violence are always and only evil. But if you can extract some good, some insight, something positive from that bad event, it’s not purely evil.
Man’s Search For Meaning by Viktor Frankl is probably the definitive text on this topic: if you can survive a concentration camp and come out of it as a richer human being, then the event itself is not the whole truth about it. As this famous quote states:
"We who lived in the concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way."
Viktor Frankl spent three years in concentration camps and lost his parents, his brother, and his pregnant wife. If anyone has the right to make the claim that a hellish experience can be enriching, it is he.
His conclusion was that life is not primarily a quest for pleasure, as Freud believed, or a quest for power, as Alfred Adler taught, but a quest for meaning. If we have a purpose we can live through even the most horrendous experiences, and come out the other end not as a cripple but as a stronger, more compassionate human being.
Apparently one-quarter of young Australians (those aged 14-25) are bullied;
36% of those are bullied online;
16% turn to drugs and alcohol;
23% are in the care of a GP or mental health professional;
six men under 25 years commit suicide each day.
But more people are speaking out. More effort is being made to understand and address these issues. And all of those energies and efforts are the ‘good’ that come out of the ‘bad’.
It seems to me that an important distinction needs to be made between process and outcome. The process of being bullied and dealing with that experience is unpleasant – for sure. But if the right attitudes and actions are taken to it, the outcome can be positive.
A young woman on the same current affairs programs said that when the bullying took the form of writing (online), it was ‘terrifying’ and ‘damaging for a long time’. But the terror and the damage are not inherent in the bullying; they occur in the response.
I deeply believe that Communication and Conflict Resolution Skills need to be taught in schools as a core curriculum subject from Prep to Year 12 because EVERYONE needs those skills, whatever their particular interests and vocational direction. This subject should be taught several times a week. It should take precedence over most other subjects because without these skills we can’t properly maximise our potential.
The widely respected and controversial public thinker Jordan Peterson made the statement in one of his podcasts that we are all responsible for the Columbine shootings. In particular, he said, those who bullied the shooters over the four years prior are also responsible for the deaths of all students and staff in that incident.
We will not resolve the issues of bullying, workplace harrassment, domestic violence or even terrorism if we play ‘Goodies and Baddies’. To say that all bullies are bad and the bullied are innocent victims is a mistake and not useful. What is needed here is skill-development – for both sides of the equation. And a big dose of honesty, since we’ve all played both roles.
Bullying CAN be character-building; it’s up to us to determine its effect.
Please do comment (below) and share (with attribution) if you feel this blog would be useful to others. NB Picture courtesy Visual Hunt.
Last night my husband had a dream about a man whose life goes bad as a consequence of choosing hard drugs. We sat on the couch this morning talking about it, and our conversation brought up a memory of a recent news item about a police officer who had his head repeatedly bashed into the ground after he tried to stop violence at a drug-influenced party. My husband remarked that probably the attacker would get away with a reduced sentence because his lawyer’s defence was that he was ‘on ice’.
You can just see where this is going. Ice (and other hard drugs) will become the new insanity plea. But why is it okay for a police officer to go to work expecting to do his job in service of the community, and instead have his head bashed into the ground?
Perhaps it’s time for crimes like this to be assessed on the basis of prior choices, on the basis of a series of past choices rather than one drug-induced ‘bad moment’. Perhaps it’s more appropriate to view that ‘bad moment’ as being the natural consequence of a series of poor choices, for which the person is accountable, rather than viewing the chooser as the ‘victim’ of his or her choices.
‘Same same’ for all of us. Being interested in health, I immediately find myself pointing to the pattern where people choose to indulge ‘pleasure now’ and then become upset when their bodies and health ‘betray them’ in later years; surely that later ill health is just a consequence of prior choices? Should we feel sorry for the person who is experiencing a heart incident after twenty or forty years of over-indulgence or unhealthy practices, or do we take a more neutral position? Do we instead say, ‘That’s not surprising’?
It seems cruel but life is a cause-effect game. Nothing comes out of nowhere; everything has seeds that are rooted somewhere, and healing requires some degree of responsibility.
When I left my 29-year relationship so suddenly it probably looked like I had treated my long-time partner badly, but that decision was some twenty-five years in the making; it was the outcome of lots of little choices over those years. He had made choices not to create a shared vision for our family, not to participate in various family activities, not to invest more in our relationship… But because there was also a lot of love and affection and honesty between us, those ‘not to’ choices got lost in the tide of events. It wasn’t until life landed a surprise new man at my feet that I had to weigh and evaluate all the moments of the previous twenty-nine years in order to make my decision.
This is an uncomfortable blog to write, and perhaps to read as well. We are biased towards being kind and nice, and towards avoiding confrontation and conflict; but often that means we avoid responsibility, which is one of the most enriching states of mind that we can enter.
So how best can we support each other in being responsible, in making the choices that best serve us and the people around us? We will not suddenly, magically, create a world in which everyone makes the best choices all the time; but we can create educational models in which life skills are prioritised. (My old hobby horse.)
We can insist that our schools prioritise life skills such as communication and conflict resolution skills and financial management; we can expose our children to the real-life stories of people who made poor choices and people who made good choices; we can rank this sort of education even more highly than other subject areas simply because everyone needs to communicate and everyone needs to be responsible for their choices, no matter what their vocation.
Let’s give our children a fighting chance against the scourge of unhappy consequences. Let’s empower them with the sort of education and support that enables them to make the small everyday choices that lead them in the direction of an inspiring life.
We all know that the internet is a two-sided beast: it’s just fabulous to be able to connect with people all around the world, to uncover news and information that might otherwise be difficult or even impossible to access, to make unexpected friends and find new clients…
AND it’s an overwhelming pressure to stay up with all the e-information, to not be constantly comparing our lives with the golden lives of others (or at least, the golden bits they share), to resist nasty comments if we’re the subject of cyber-bullying, to not get sucked into buying everything we don’t need because of the exciting offers that land in our inbox, etc. etc. And I’m just scratching the surface of the pros and cons!
The darker side of Facebook loomed closer as we began to recognise those pressures and learnt about privacy and security leaks and other significant issues. The Boomers among us, for example, are concerned that our young people are growing up in an exceedingly public era where everything they think and feel and do is announced to the world, whether their big successes and failures, or what they ate for breakfast.
So what could be the silver lining on that constant public exposure?